Fear

I read a quote that resonated with me.  It's from The Little Book of Courage.  

At the bottom of every one of your fears is simply the fear that you can't handle whatever life may bring you.  
                                          Susan Jeffers, PH.D.

True for me!  The chapter, called Know You Can Cope, talks about naming your fears and perceiving the fear versus the coping mechanism that we think we don't have.  In other words, just fake it 'til you make it.  Have confidence in yourself and your abilities even if you don't feel like you can cope with what life has to offer you.

I decided to make a list of all my fears that I could think of.  I chuckle a bit as I review this list.  I know some of these fears are unrealistic.  I also know that some of these fears are very serious even though I have no experience in my history that has helped create them.  But, here they are, for your entertainment as well as for my reflection:

In no particular order:

1.  Being trapped in a car
2.  Falling off a cliff in a car
3.  Rolling over in a car
4.  Losing a child prematurely
5.  Heights (with no guard or hand rail)
6.  Snakes
7.  Losing the man I love forever
8.  Rolling over in water in a car
9.  Unfamiliar situations, especially involving people
10. Not being good enough
11. Getting old and fat and ugly

And of course there are the fears of, say, trying anything dangerous...but I didn't really count them because I don't try dangerous sports or activities on a regular basis....

When I look these over, they don't seem all that severe...except #s 4, 7 and 10.  They make me cry every time I look or think about them.  But the rest seem kind of silly in a way. 

A few famous men said, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself."  This is the time in my life where I'm crawling out from under the covers to stare fear in the face and say, "Fuck off fear...this is my life and there's no place for you in it."  More to come.