Yin and Yang We Go Together

Sometimes the conversations are so difficult. It's not that we are so different as we just have different ways of communicating to each other. HE tends to wait until every detail is worked out in his head before HE expresses himself. It's as if HE doesn't want to deliver a half wrapped present. I, on the other hand, want to give the present to him before I pay for it and get it out of the store....this causes, well, difficulties.

HE would rather I tell him the worst case scenario then surprise him if it doesn't happen. "I want to sleep with the boy," HE'd rather me say then tell him I won't go through with it. But what if is not my intention to sleep with him? What if I really don't know what my intentions are at this point, only having met the boy once outside of the initial meeting? Is it better to prepare for the worst and be surprised by something less that the worst?

I use my judgement but HE doesn't believe in my judgement. HE believes in his though. If HE waits to tell me that HE has seen someone else, but I wait to tell him that the boy asked me out, it's somehow different to him. I get it on so many levels. I get that you can't be confident in someone else's thoughts and feelings like you are with your own because you can't slice open their brains, crawl inside and hibernate all winter until you feel very confident they feel like you do. But even so, HE judges me for my judgement.

HE wants me to put more thought into my questions. I want him to just talk more. I want to see him working through his feelings. HE wants to hear that I have well planned thoughts and already have the details worked out in my head.

HE doesn't want me to sleep with the boy, or anybody else for that matter. But HE wants to continue sleeping with her and whomever else happens to appear on his radar.

Push and pull; right and wrong; good and evil; ebb and flow; light and darkness; yin and yang...we go together and can't be without the other. It is a perfect balance even in all of our fearful, imbalanced discussions. And at the end of the day, I ache for him just as much as I did the day before. HE and I belong together.